was it the right thing to do.....everybody says yes but i already regret doing it...
We got into such and argument when i decided i'd finally given up on him....
but now....heh i did what he lst told me not to do..cried too long and am still crying...
it hurts because i still love him..but i couldn't take it...and then knowing what else he asked of me only hurt me more...

Ow...

I feel like someone stuck a sword through my heart then pulled it out did it again and then twisted it.....

Not gonna say who

Or why

Or what

When
Or what for....

but....my heart is aching and I'm beginning to hate love.

"...............spectful, rude bitch that had no respect for any peoples feelings or property." This is what she said to me. Well I'm sorry i left her teddy bear on the porch. And I'm sorry that I won't...no...can't go into her house. I'm sorry her dad is an asshole that sexually assaults his daughters best friends. I'm sorry that she cussed me out after i left it on your porch for she and then threw it away cause i touched it when she gave it to me. I'm sorry that your dad did this shit on your birthday. I'm sorry she had to come into the office and be a huge bitch about giving me my stuff, glaring at me and walking out without saying a word to me. I'm sorry your fuckin ex said ur tripping. bitch you're my ex best friend and you were tripping over a damn teddy bear. Stupid childish idiot it was not my choice to leave it on ur front porch and i tried to explain it to you. I thanked you more than enough times for taking me in for the time you did. I bought you boots that you'd wanted for months because you couldn't afford them. They were your birthday present. I gave you presents i knew you'd like for Christmas even though i didn't get dipshit from you not even a card (but thanks for at least saying thank you and apologizing that you couldn't get me anything. It's still alright). The spectful, rude, bitch isn't me it was you. You didn't have to cuss me out over the damn thing you could have just said "I would have appreciated if you had of given it me me the next day or something." And I know the world doesn't revolve around me bitch. If i didn't know that I wouldn't worry sick about other people. I wouldn't have worried about you at all. No respect for peoples feelings? When you were hungry and didn't have money to buy food cause you were at school (and this happened on many many occasions) Who fuckin offered you a meal and said "My treat, you don't have to pay me back. Ur my friend. I love you now lets eat." When people were being a bitch to you who said "Don't worry about it. It's they're loss I'm sure they get over it." I'm tired of you bitchy childish ways Brittany and NO I DON'T ONLY FUCKING CARE ABOUT MYSELF. I DID A BUNCH A SHIT FOR YOU MORE THAN A FRIEND WOULD DO. I DID WHAT A SISTER WOULD DO FOR YOU AND YOU GO AND WALK AWAY FROM ME, TURN YOUR BACK ON ME!!! SURE YOU WERE THERE FOR ME WHEN I NEEDED A PLACE TO STAY SURE YOU WERE SOMETIMES THERE FOR ME WHEN I ALMOST FELL THROUGH AND GAVE UP BUT YOU LETTING ANY OF THIS SHIT GET IN THE WAY OF A FUCKING FRIENDSHIP I THOUGHT YOU FUCKING VALUED I WAS SO FUCKING WRONG ABOUT YOU!!! I THOUGHT YOU WERE BETTER THAN THAT. I THOUGHT WE WOULD LAST THROUGH IT CAUSE YOU WERE MY SISTER AND I YOURS!!! CAUSE BITCH A TRUE FRIEND WOULD HAVE NEVER LET ANY SORT OF SHIT DO THIS TO A FRIENDSHIP FRIENDS DAD OR NOT!!!!! And whats this "I don't want you pressin charges against my dad." You TOLD ME to call the police on him. And if this had been any other man you would have said, "Call the police and go a head and press charges. Get a restraining order if you need to I'll help you out." Yo....Brittany check this.........JUST CAUSE HE'S UR DAD, DOESN'T MEAN HE GETS OFF FOR FREE. If you gonna keep acting like a childish fool. Then you can do it by yourself Britt. Check it. I'm done with you and your childish ways.

:iconzombieccancerplz: I ALREADY DID THIS LIKE 3 TIMES!! STOP TAGGING ME WITH IT!!!
I was tagged by

1. Post these rules
2. Each tagged person must tell 8 things about themselves
3. At the end, you have to tag 8 people, and post their icons in the journal
4. Go to their page with a comment saying you tagged them
5. NO TAGBACKS

1. I'm starting to hate this tag

2. I'm actually quite corrupt on the inside if you haven't figured that out already.

3.I'm becoming more and more sickly by the day if you didn't know that already either.

4. I've got a new happier mood and I'm trying so hard to stay that way

5. I despise blobs and will kill then on sight.

6. I'm sorry and kind of ashamed to say i think I'm becoming addicted to alcohol.

7. I swear if the world were a bit different I'd either be a Mercenary or being transferred out of juvenile hall to jail right now.

8. I need everyone help to become a better person because I'm afraid to do things alone so help me. I need you all (MARRY ME EVERYONE!!! I LOVE YOU *gets all dramatic wearing a wedding dress hold flowers and having tears at the corners of my eye.)

I tag anybody who wants to do this...again...

Name: Araza Corsene
Alias*:Zuna Diacora
Gender: Female
Age: 18
Height*:5'7"
Weight*:204
Appearance: She actually has a very nice figure despite her weight. She is of Afro-American and Indian origin so her skin complexion is that of milk chocolate with a yellow undertone color. She wears a black with a red dragon tunic {belts are connected to her sleeves which come up to her elbows} most of the time but sometimes she will change (plain black long tunic with black under pants usually worn for when she's killing or working {ace bandages will be wrapped up to both elbows when she wears this outfit}, and for special occasions or seducing a red long tunic no pants with a gold dragon embroidered on it{usually then she has her arms and ankles all bearing gold dragons tattooed on as well as two then gold bracelets for each wrist and ankle). All of her tunics are cut off at the shoulder. a She has black hair (smooth and silky almost like black satin) down to her shoulders and her bangs are long enough to reach her chin. She has dark brown eyes that sometimes turn hazel depending on her moods and glasses that she wears for reading and a few other things. Occasionally an ace bandage will be seen wrapped around her right hand up to her elbow. She has long fingers considering that she came from a family of musicians (piano players mostly) and long arms and legs as well.
Specialties: Silent killing blending into shadows, seduction, and quick reflexs
Weaponry: twin swords and throwing daggers strapped to her legs Every no and again she'll use her bow and arrows
Weaknesses: Any kind of talk about her past would take about two minutes before she excused herself to go and ball her eyes out.
She may have quick reflexes but repeated blows wear her down after a while and she retreats. Its best not to give her a chance to rest and go after her immediately.
She hates the cold. Give her a job in a cold climate and she becomes very slow quite irritant and rather vulnerable.
History (Must include reason why they became a mercenary): She was brought up in a very strict and demanding family and because of it she'd always felt hated by her family. She never knew her father but her mother moved and left her to her grandmother who's screaming and yelling she got tired of and was eventually kicked out of her house anyway. After that her best friend turned her back on her and she has decided to no longer trust anybody. to sum it all up a man tried to take her innocence by force and almost succeeded but she escaped him and to this day still has nightmares about it She does not believe anybody can be trusted because that all turn their backs eventually. She has her doubts about love and doesn't know whether its real or not and whether to believe in it or not. She tried not to get too close to people for fear of being rip to pieces inside. There are some times when she can be very vulnerable especially if you know how to talk to her but most times she on her guard. If you know how to speak to her then you can possibly manage to bring her guard down and strike at the least expected times....she enjoys calm company but isolates herself a lot. because she doesn't know how to really talk to people and get in with the action. With all that has happened to Araza, she has decided that the best thing for her is going on a journey to find herself as well as to gain status and authority in order to ind her mother and her grandmother and the man to tried to steal her most precious possession and return the favors with vengeance.
Likes*: playing the piano, composing music for piano violin and cello, peace and quiet at least an hour a day, calm company, wild animals and nature
Dislikes*: anyone that yells at her, perverts, animal haters